Donnerstag, 8. Januar 2009


(Tôkyô zankoku keisatsu)


Genre: Gore/ Splatter

Ruka is a police officer in a special squad formed to eradicate human mutations that have recently sprung into existence, the result of a virus created by a mad scientist simply known as Key Man.

Killing these unwieldy mutants is no easy task, and Ruka, naturally enough, carries a samurai sword with her at all times. Despite being on opposite sides of the fence, Ruka and Key Man share a common bond: the murder of their fathers years earlier at the hands of the police, and both she and Key Man seek revenge for their dads' untimely demise.

Did you like THE MACHINE GIRL? Or did you like MEATBALL MACHINE? Or maybe you're a great fan of Olaf Ittenbach?

Then THIS is the right film for you.
A story of revenge with gore that's SO OVER THE TOP that it's almost comical. Limbs are cut off en masse and about 147894365934 billion gallons of film-blood are spilled.

If I had to decribe the movie in a few words:
Olaf Ittenbach went to Japan, watched THE MACHINE GIRL, liked

it, wrote his own script whilst watching MEATBALL MACHINE, dragged some BDSM folks out of some BDSM clubs and shot a movie.

And NO, this isn't a BAD critic. I REALLY liked the movie.
It also had one of the most AWESOME fight scenes (at least in my opinion).

So if you like over-the-top-gore and stuff - watch this movie. It's quite entertaining. a WRIST CUTTER G!!!

Wrist cutter G yayyyy yayyyy yayyyy kawaiiiiiii!!!!!

Here's the trailer btw! XD

Mittwoch, 7. Januar 2009




Genre: Horror/ Comedy/ Drama

Customs agents discover a huge amount of human hair along with the bald corpse of a young girl. This arouses the curiosity of Yamazaki, a mortuary employee with a hair fetish, particularly since the girl's hair continues to grow. Now a mad hair-peddler with an endless stock of locks, Yamazaki sells her ever-growing hair to salons to be used for extensions. Meanwhile, Yuko, an up-and-coming hair stylist, is entrusted with the care of her timid and frightened niece, Mami, whose body bares the signs of abuse. It's not long before death surrounds them and their extension-wearing clientele. The hair, it seems, has a life of its own, with lethal, vengeful intentions. And Yuko and Mami must untangle the mystery before more deaths occur.

OH NOES! It's the hair again!
Okay, as we all know, the Asian people seem to have a great fascination when it comes to hair. Hair is something that belongs to Asian Horror movies like ...mustard belongs to liverwurst.
AND: I can't stand any more hair movies.

That was my point of view when I started watching EXTE.
But after a few minutes I was like: likes!

The movie was pretty good, a nice combo between Horror, Comedy and Drama. Well, it actually IS one of those "innocent girl...blabla...killed...blah blah...revenge" movies, but you'll forget about the fact that you can't see those movies anymore because EXTE is...different. Different in a pretty good way.
Some scenes are hilarious, and the end scene is worth suffering through the crappy parts!

So next time you wonde rif you should watch the crappy remake of Ju-On (OKAY, it wasn't THAT crappy AND it had Ted Raimi) or maybe a Japanese original - Watch EXTE.


Donnerstag, 11. Dezember 2008

Bodies Like Sheep

Found this on YOUTUBE.
Pretty awesome, huh?




Genre: Horror

A young woman is discharged from hospital after being treated for a cancer is seems unlikely she will survive. Having endured the devastating effects of her treatment, the woman is left without hair and her sister buyers her a wig, as way of clinging on to the little dignity she has left. However, it's not long before her sister begins to suspect that the wig has a sinister power that is rapidly taking control of her ailing sibling...

Now this was one hariy movie.
I this case, hairy means: Oh my god was that bad.
The movie started off pretty interesting, but lost substance pretty quickly and ended rather unsurprisingly.
The end was even worth a laugh, even though I'm pretty sure the writer didn't intend to make this funny. Yeah. Should have been scary and dramatic, huh? In addition to that, the ending was WAY too long and didn't make as much sense as it should have made. Not even the good acting was able to make up for this...
The beginning - okay, the first 10 minutes- WERE interesting, but then Mr.Hyun-jung Do decited to stop thinking and just get out every cliche of a horror movie he could come up with. It
even has a "cat-jumps-out-of-closet" scene! SCARY!!!
I mean - have you seen the SIMPSONS Treehouse of Horror Episode where Homer is posessed by his toupee? Same story. Only better. Ha.

But I know:
Some call it plagiarism, others call it research....
I call it boring.
End of review.

Mittwoch, 10. Dezember 2008




Genre: Horror

In a disused prison camp where thousands of innocent victims were once brutally murdered, the most extreme reality TV show ever devised is about to go on air.
11 contestants only have to survive one night within its chilling and blood-stained walls to walk away with a fortune. But little do they know their presence will release the tormented souls of the murdered who are determined to seek indiscriminate vengeance on those still living. As an entire nation watches on, the contrived ‘tasks’ set by the TV producers soon take on a life of their own and the contestants realise they face a terrifying supernatural battle to survive.

I have seen better films.
But I've also seen worse. okay, maybe my opinion doesn't count in this case for I was drunk and bored when I saw the movie but: Eh.
It was some sort of "Big brother goes Horror." Reminded a bit of SCARED (though SCARED was MUCH better and way more cool and stuff) and RED ROOM for the question is: What will you do for money? How far will you go?
What I also liked was that it wasn't one of those "Innocent girl gets killed and her spirit seeks revenge"- movies. It was more the HAUNTED HILL stuff.

I didn't like the actors. They were all a bit to...I dunno. Their characters were pretty boring, and I sat there: "Come on, die. You're boring" No sympathy for them, sorry.
AND I just CAN'T cope with a movie that deals with reality TV. Gawd, how I HATE reality TV. Seriously, get a life.

I'm not going to say I liked this movie very much, but if you have nothing better to do and all other movies are already gone - it's watchable. (when you're drunk)

Eh. Trailer and stuff.

Oh by the way I just had an awesome idea:
Why not change the setting to Germany and the prison to a concentration camp, and it's haunted by the ghost of HITLER HIMSELF?!?!?!?!?


(Samgeori Geukjang)


Genre: Musical/ Horror/ Comedy

It is late at night, just outside the humble home where a disillusioned young high school student lives alone with her frail grandmother. Despite the late hour and inclement weather the old lady is determined to go out, claiming that the neighborhood theater is about to play an old film the young girl has never heard of, one that grandma herself starred in back in the day. She wanders out into the night, never to return. The girl, now all alone, abandons her schooling to search for her missing grandmother, eventually taking a job in the box office of the theater that was to be grandma’s destination in the hope that if she simply waits there long enough the old woman will finally arrive for her phantom movie screening. But grandma’s movie isn’t the only phantom here, the theater itself playing host to a quartet of singing ghosts who appear late at night, eventually befriending the girl even as they torment the theater manager with memories he’d do anything to just leave behind. This is the Midnight Ballad For Ghost Theater...

The Grudge meets Rocky Horror Picture Show.
That was my first thought on this Film and it will probably be yours, too.

I was convinced that I'd switch off the movie after
10 minutes for it would be totally stupid and stuff...but I didn't.
Nope. Watched the whole movie. ADORED IT.

It features different types of music, not only pop songs and stuff. The songs are catchy, and after watching it the second time I found myself singing along at some parts - even though I had NO idea what it was I was singing.

The actors were pretty good singers - okay, the guy that played the owner of the theater could use some more practise, but the kinda chubby woman reminded me of some sort of korean version of Queen Latifa...she has a pretty awesome voice. A nice running gag is the owner of the theater, who has great intentions in ending his life...

The story and the feeling of the film makes up for the kinda...crappy and lame look of a certain Mr. Bullhead. ...hehehe...he...ahh, why am I still talking? Just go ahead and watch the movie!



(Gumiho gajok)


Genre: Musical/Horror/Comedy

A family of mystic foxes, dreaming about being humans - a dream that can come true! All they have to do is eat the liver of a human being.
But, as always, things don't go the way they were planned by the foxes...

Korean-Horror-musical Thingie.
Sounds pretty strange. And it IS strange, but strange in a good way. When I first read about the movie I was: WTF???

But - it was quite entertaining Not scary at all, but pretty funny. At least in some parts. The detective reminded me pretty much of a certain FBI Agent named MILTON DAMMERS. Check out Peter Jackson's THE FRIGHTENERS and you'll know what I'm talking about.

The bad thing: The songs aren't very
catchy. You spend several minutes trying to figure
out the melody, and just when you
think you got it, the song is over. Eh.

But: HEY! A Korean-Horror-Dance-Comedy-Musical-Thingie!!!!
Singing and dancing and stuff!

Isn't that AWESOME?!
Go and check it out for Christ's sake!!!